A look into my mind…

I believe I was given the gift of connectivity. It sounds simple, but if I use that gift to pair a song to a performance, and mix in motivational speaking it becomes a compelling layered composition. When we look to be entertained why are we more likely to pay attention? What is it that we’re looking for?

Recently, a lady in a parking lot recognized me as a contestant from The Voice. She turned to me excited, hoping to catch my attention. With a flicker of green in her eyes and a smile behind her N95 mask, she shouted:

“You were great on The Voice! How was it to record the live performances at home? It must’ve been fun!” 

I responded as I would a friend or family member. I replied,“Ugh, it was not fun at all. I’m so glad—” 

I saw her body start to slump in disappointment. I mentally scattered and rethought the rest of my comment. With a gentle smile and a light shrug of the shoulders I said,“— I’m soooo glad I got the chance to experience it though!”

She smiled and encouraged another minute of conversation, then wished me luck in my future. Afterwards, I sat in my car slumped in confusion. I thought about how interesting it was that she was looking for some sort of light that shined through the curtain of a rare experience in Hollywood. In my answer and for a brief moment I almost disappointed her. She wanted to connect with me, but she didn’t care for my truth. She was looking for me to add a flicker to the spark in her eyes. Hope, light, inspiration (whatever you want to call it) exists everywhere.

We’ve become crafty with how we ask for what we need. So crafty, that our needs become misunderstood or worse go completely overlooked and we never receive it. No one blatantly asks for hope, yet we search for it in music lyrics, stories, and conversation. Life is not always fair and it’s almost always not easy but  hope gives us the fuel to persevere.

That’s where I fit in this world. 

When I perform I can serenade my listeners and invite each of them to open their hearts. When I dance I can move my body to music like I’ve lived a life unshackled from the stresses of our everyday struggles.  And now, I can write a blog and share how my childhood traumas were blessings in disguise.

I’m choosing to share my life with you in hopes that you will find what you are looking for in yourself.